Strawhat Man!
by GeckoMoriaShadowLord
Summary: By day he's an innocent college kid. Nice, funny, cute…but not the brightest bulb in the shed. His friends smile, pat his head, give him meat, and don't really take him seriously. That all changes when the sun goes down.


**Title: Strawhat Man! **

**Summary: By day he's an innocent college kid. Nice, funny, cute…but not the brightest bulb in the shed. His friends smile and pat his head, give him meat, don't really take him seriously. That all changes when the sun goes down. By night, he takes up a cloak, a mask, and a battered strawhat to fight the underworld crime that runs rampant in the city. It's not long before Strawhat Man has become a first-class vigilante. Worshipped by hoards of admirers, loved by countless women, and hated by various criminals. But who is Strawhat man? Where did he come from? What does he want? Enter the city of Grand Line to discover a world of intrigue, suspense, love, and adventure. **

**Genre: Humor/ adventure/ suspense/drama/ light romance**

**Warning: – Vulgarity! Idiocy! Utter strangeness and weirdness! **

**Pairings: Luffy x Women, other pairs (no yaoi) Eventual Luffy x Hancock. **

**Rated: T, later M. **

**Author's note: I have been **_**dying**_** to do an alternate identity story with Luffy being the main character. Inspiration comes from the various 'alternate ego' stories, i.e-Batman, Zorro, Spiderman. **

~0~

_**Prologue **_

If I were you, I would take this as a sign  
Believe it's true, we were never meant to fly  
And I owe you, I know you more than anyone alive  
And I will not let go  
They will not remember this song  
No matter what we do we'll be wrong  
They will not remember this song  
No matter what we do we'll be wrong  
I can't seem to see the seal we're breaking  
I can't seem to see the seal we broke  
I refuse to recognize your views  
Someone shouted "Everything's for nothing"  
Somebody shouted, "All is lost"  
But I can't buy that nonsense too  
Way back when the prophecies began  
Do you think they really had a master plan  
Or were they merely writing fables, stories?  
I don't know but it has occurred to me  
The punishment that they threaten constantly  
It's only real if they could just convince me

-_"Down, Down, Down to Mephisto's Café, Streetlight Manifesto" _

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It's one of those days.

He's just arrived in this city, and so he's momentarily surprised to be feeling the vibe so early. He'd think he'd miss his friends and family whom he's left miles behind.

But he _does_ feel it; can just _feel_ it in the very marrow of his bones. It's one of those days in which he just wants to sing at the top of his lungs, dance at the tips of his toes; jump and cavort 'til sunset, though he can't really carry a tune all that well, and dance, even less. But he pays this no more mind then is necessary. It's simply one of those days in which he just wants to dance and make love all day long, whether he's good at it or not.

Love with meat, that it. Girls are great and all, and a lot are great fighters or full of Brains. But he is but a simple Pooh Bear with Very Little Brain who got a Headache from Thinking Too Hard.

Sanji, the guy he met yesterday and his new roommate down at UCGL's dorms, would have a conniption fit if he heard all the stuff about girls that went on inside his head. Which wasn't much. He already seemed absurdly offended when he had told the blond that he'd rather read Shonen Jump over Playboy any day.

But the roomie isn't a bad guy or one of the freaky creepers that stalk women and little kids on the internet and Luffy is actually rather excited that the blond is rooming with him. Sanji is a top-rate chef, or so the blond informed him and would be happy to take care of meals for the both of them, if Luffy was willing.

And Luffy was willing. More than willing. He can already imagine the various entrees that Sanji can create with all the hundreds types of meat available.

Luffy's smile can light up the darkest room, and it is even brighter when he's thinking about that which he loves most. And it is actually this hope to see his dream realized which had driven him to the streets in search of a local grocery store to see if he can buy some of that meat that they sell in huge chunks that weigh around fifteen pounds.

He's not sure just how much Sanji needs to make dinner for the two of them. But the more the better, right? But he suspects that Sanji will get mad and read him the riot act as soon as he walked in and just go on and on about mystery cooking techniques that he won't really understand. He doesn't know why, he just has this feeling. Seems like he's known Sanji for forever. He's an easy guy to read.

But, meat is meat is meat, right? Right.

Some people act like it's something completely different, they look utterly astounded when he lugs his fifteen pound meat package to the checkout line and slams it down on the grey conveyor belt with his same sunny smile.

It doesn't matter, he'll go do just that right now. There is no fighting this feeling of absolute happiness which threatens to engulf and swallow his spirit whole. And Luffy gave in to it without a murmur of protest, the beginnings of a tune already fluttering down from his lips.

It is an old ditty that Shanks taught him long ago, a tune that the red-haired man and his carefree cronies would sing until their throats scraped raw, one that he claimed to have learned from his sailing days. It is an ancient lay, the words medieval and the meaning archaic; but Luffy sings it with full gusto. The old words, which were fresh and lustily sung when the Americas were yet to be discovered, seems both strange and perfectly natural coming from modern city boy's smiling lips.

Yes, it is definitely one of those days when lady luck seems to be smiling on his rough and tumble bedhead. And what's more, the day smells of something which has his senses perked to the max, the smell of which he is always constantly on the lookout for.

No, not meat. Better then meat.

The day smells of adventure, and, perhaps, of romance. His straw sandals beat time on the sidewalk.

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_**Thanks much for reviews and for reading. **_


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